dear diary...

a warning to myself

whenever i really like someone

it doesn’t turn out well

possessiveness

passive-aggressiveness

ghosting

repulsion

jealousy

yearning

it’s a cycle, a vicious cycle

to crash so unbelievably hard

to fall too deeply and madly in love with

perhaps the idea of a person

only to realise what i was so emotionally invested in

was really just a figment of reality

something so distant and detached

from the person in front of me

then again, i don’t think i am 

enlightened enough to 

be able to discriminate

between loving the idea of someone

and loving someone for the person they are

so

this is a warning to my pitiful self

to control, against all futility,

that tidal wave of emotions 

and brace for a heartache

to quell any expectations i may have of this newfound friend

to be selective and stringent about the words and thoughts i entrust her with

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